


Of Chocolates and Serenades

by Ryuuto



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cliche, M/M, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-19
Updated: 2011-08-19
Packaged: 2017-10-22 20:27:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/242246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ryuuto/pseuds/Ryuuto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's nearing Valentine's Day, and Karkat is somewhat determined to pull out all the stops to get Dave Strider's heart.  He just needs a little help from some friends.</p><p>A HSO: Team Davekat fill from Round 1.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Chocolates and Serenades

**Author's Note:**

> This was a collaborative piece with Mew! I hope you guys enjoy!

He hated winter.

Ha also hated people.  
   
One person in particular.  
   
One person in particular has noticed him thinking about another particular person.  
   
Karkat Vantas has a lot of shame- but the one thing he has the most shame about, what he winced about when he drifted into thinking-too-much-land, what kept him awake at night- was himself. There were so many things he should fix, but fixing the train wreck that was his life was impossible. Not when this happens.  
   
Not when Terezi of all people- his grade school crush and very good friend noticed it before he was ready to acknowledge it.  
   
Not when she was pestering  him about it- because gogdamnit he was going to rip something to shreds while screaming bloody murder at this rate, he needed to calm down but it was hard- because She just thought it was so hilarious that he crushes the same way after so long, but that’s not all, the thing she really enjoys about his situation is who.  
   
“-because FUCK like it’s MY fault that I MIGHT have the misfortune of falling face-first into this gogdamn load gaper of festering FEELING called affection for the most prickish fuckass who I ever had the misfortune to know.”  
   
His arms waved about him, deep-set scowl on his face to attempt to convey how frustrating this situation was. But it didn't. Because apparently if was all still just really really funny. Terezi kept cackling as he began to wind down from what may or may not have been a five minute rant on the topic of him.  
   
“Oh Karkles, you should lighten up! Dave isn’t nearly as bad as you think. You should tell him!” She was grinning widely, arched eyebrows dancing suggestively across her forehead. Her red shades glinted, sinisterly as Karkat’s scowl deepened from mere mention. “He's always saying about how he would love to try new things.”  
   
“No fucking way.”  
   
Her eyebrows continued to dance. Suggestively.  
   
That was not going to happen. No way. This was over before it started- because that would be the most idiotic thing to top all of the other dumbass moves he’d managed yet in life. No.  
   
He looked at Terezi, who was still grinning in confidence at her statement. No.  
   
He glanced around the miserable wintery day, at the people walking by the park Terezi had dragged him to for this ‘confrontation’ and the cars (currently trapped in a traffic jam) backed up in a line along the road. They seemed to be paying him no mind, but it felt pressuring all the same. No.  
   
He glanced back at the girl who probably knew Strider best out of his four human twit friends. No.  
   
He looked down at the phone he was pulling out of his pocket. Terezi’s nose twitched. She cackled again. He dialed Jade.  
   
There was one reason he would be calling Jade. Karkat knew. He knew what this meant. 

He was giving in.  
   
He already regretted this.

\---

Dave wasn't one to look forward to the morning of school, especially with Valentine's Day around the corner.  Whenever he opened his locker in the morning, it was like an avalanche of gifts from his fans.  He found it a little shallow and meaningless, but accepted them with grace and irony.  Naturally, the young Strider wasn't surprised in the least when he went to grab his books for first period and found a messy pile of love notes and store bought chocolates.  However, one thing caught his eye immediately.

It was different from the rest.  Instead of chocolate, he found a single red rose with an envelope attached by a thin, red ribbon.  Dave took out the rose, and untied the ribbon to take a closer look at the paper.  Inside was a neatly typed poem on decent quality paper.  Nothing fancy or glamorous about it, but as he read it, he realized that it was one of his ironically favorite romantic poems.  Only a select few people knew about it, therefore this secret admirer must be serious.

Dave pocketed the poem and grabbed his books, but he wasn't quite sure what to do with the rose.  It would just wilt no matter what he did, which was a shame, but it wasn't like he could wear it around like a fashionable senorita.  Nothing to do but keep it in his locker on top of his notebooks.  The blond closed up his locker, and walked the short distance to first period Chemistry.

Upon entering the classroom, his best friend, John Egbert, cheerfully waved him over to their usual spot tucked in one of the frontmost corners.  He nodded to John and Karkat, the latter scowling more so than normal.  Whatever.  Dave took his seat and proceeded to ignore the grump in favor of telling his best bro about his latest secret admirer.  The ebon-haired teen looked excited as he told him about what he got in his locker.

"In short, I'm impressed that they took the time to research this shit."

"Wow!  So, this person must be serious!  I mean, I know you don't like that admirer stuff, you list the reasons at least once a week and it always gets bigger--"

"Lies and blasphemy, Egbert."

"Whatever, Dave," John retorted as he rolled his eyes, "Point is, maybe you should give this one a chance?"

Dave shrugged by way of answer right as the bell rang for class to begin.  He wouldn't admit it aloud, but he was curious about what else to expect from this person.

\--

The minutes were ticking by with the grace and speed of a pregnant hoofbeast minutes from expelling it’s disgusting mammalian offspring. Which was of course to say, they were creeping by so slowly they were hardly going by at all. Karkat hadn’t heard a word the teacher had said all day, too busy listening to the pounding of his own vascular pump and turning over the information he had overheard that morning.

It wasn’t his fault he had heard Strider talking about it. The asshole had been right there.  
   
But he couldn’t get the thought out of his head- he’d liked it.  
   
Even if it was in some frustrating ironic kind of way, Karkat’s plan was bearing fruit. Sort of.  
   
He needed to talk to Jade again.  
   
When the loud ringing that signaled the end of another thinkpan-churning day of schoolfeeding pierced his thoughts, he stood immediately, bowling past anyone in his path as he made headlong for Harley’s last period classroom.  
   
The bespectacled human spotted him before he reached her and smiled brightly. A troll stood beside her, the two of them having exited the classroom amidst a conversation.  
   
“Karkitty!” The troll girl squealed happily, pouncing him as he skidded to a halt. He didn’t fall, but he stumbled on impact and sent her a spiteful glare. “The huntress is very pleased to see her good kitty friend, and is excited to infurm him that she knows about his romantic purrrsuit furom her other friend, and-“  
   
Karkat was glaring daggers at Jade. Jade shrugged back, smile dropping like a rock to be replaced by a complete unconcealed lack of empathy. “She’s gonna help, Fuckass.”  
   
He bristled. Nepeta purred, still holding onto him, but bouncing annoyingly on her feet at the same time. “I don’t need help, it went really fucking well, so you-“  
   
“I know it did! Dave is one of my best friends; he told me!” She crossed her arms, sternness now replacing her previous expression. “You still need help. You hooked him- you got his interest. Now you have to reel him in!”  
   
Karkat groaned. This was crap and not going to work. He was being stupid from the beginning and getting excited was just his dipshit way of showing the world just what a fucking moron he was being.  
   
Again.  
   
But he spent almost all night looking for a poem that topped last one anyway.

\----

The next few mornings revealed further presents from his new secret admirer. There were more poems, ones he had never read before and quickly became favorites; once there was a very simple box tied shut with a red ribbon.  Curious, Dave pulled out the box and untied it.  As soon as he opened it, he smelled milk chocolate, and inside was what looked like a treasure trove of chocolate nuggets.  They didn't look store bought, and as he popped one in his mouth he could say for sure that it was homemade and surprisingly delicious.

This was so different from what normally happened, and the person was doing a damn good job of keeping his interest so far.  He never liked secret admirers for the fact that they didn't confront him, but he could understand why they chose anonymity.  Dave's pack of fangirls could be intimidating, not to mention he himself could seem pretty far out of reach.  He was picky, as Jade would say, and preferred people who actually took the time to get to know him instead of going after him just for his looks and status as 'the popular kid' in school.

Whoever his secret admirer was, they deserved a shot at the very least, and Dave was going to find out who it was.  That he vowed as he closed the locker and headed off to first period.

Today's first period was English, and the only person he knew in that class was Karkat.  They bickered incessantly during it, but the blond enjoyed this type of verbal sparring.  It was certainly more relaxing than the ones he got into with Rose.  Yet, the troll seemed more peeved than normal, not to mention way more tired.

"Sup, Kitkat?" he greeted as he sat down at his desk.  Karkat glared at him heatedly.

"Damn it, Strider, you know very fucking well that I'm not one of your shitty candybars!"

"I stopped carin' years ago."

And their bickering escalated to new heights from there for the rest of the day.

\---

She was in his face, uncomfortably close and obviously fed up with his (completely legitimate) Bullshit. “Do you LIKE him, fuckass?”  
   
Karkat twitched. He wanted to draw away but she had him backed into a corner- nowhere to escape.  He gritted his teeth and looked away. She growled a high frustrated growl and hit him with the rolled newspaper she held threateningly.  
   
“It doesn’t even fucking matter!” He glared at her, finally locking eyes with the green doom. “I’m not going to…”  
   
She cut him off.  
   
“Do it.”  
   
The fight went out of his shoulders without even snarled response.  
   
All the longwinded arguments over the last month and a half, on this very topic had drained him. This was stupid. All of it. He never should have started it and he never should have let it get this far. But today was the day. The culmination of the plan. If he was going to go down in flames, he might as well do it with Jade still there.  
   
He was going to fucking do this.  
   
It was Valentine’s Day, but it wasn’t going to happen.  
   
Nothing ever went right.  
   
He was shocked it went as well as it did. Strider hadn’t even questioned him when he demanded they spend the day together. It had left a wet, sticky feeling of dread that he knew, but he showed no sign. He couldn’t see past that goddamned pokerface.  
   
Dinner.  
   
A nice restaurant. He commented on the irony usage, and Karkat glared.  
   
A few witty jibes and ‘fuck you’s were exchanged that night and he thought it was going well. This was his ‘now or never’ situation. He had to do it now. Tell him, and hope he wasn’t going to reject him too cruelly in public.  
   
His heart hammered. A waiter carrying cocktails for a couple a few tables over was giving them looks. He stared at his refection in those shades.  
   
Dave might be staring back.  
   
“Strider-“  
   
He didn’t get more out before a loud crash, groan, and the cocktails were all over him.

\---

Dave had been waiting for this moment, for Karkat to finally confess.  Ever since John spilled the beans in an episode of panicked projectile word vomit, he had wanted to give the troll the opportunity to say it himself.  He didn't look it, but his attention was all on the teen in front of him, the one who was sappily romantic in the best of ways.

And then it all went to alcoholic shit when the cocktails spilled all over Karkat.  The blond minutely winced as the waiter scurried and spewed out apologies like a geyser of shame.  Luckily, the check was on their table, and Dave had enough cash to pay for them both.  He left the money on the table and escorted an unusually silent Karkat out of the restaurant.

The biting cold of February was relentless, probably more so to his unofficial date with the liquid all over him.  Dave took off his jacket and easily put it across Karkat's shoulders, never mind the fact that he was freezing as soon as it was off.  He was startled, but took it with a snort.

"You smell like alcohol, Kitkat," Dave casually remarked as he slid a friendly arm across thin shoulders.  The troll rolled his eyes, but made no move to take the arm off, much to his pleasure.

"No, really? Astounding observation, Strider.  Humans were wrong about you blonds."

"Only thing they got right was that we know how to have fun." Karkat made a choking noise, amusing enough to leave a tiny smile on Dave's lips, a crack in his poker face.  They bantered like always, all the way to Vantas's home.

There was a moment as the teen opened the door and gave the blond's jacket back.  A quick lean, and they could have kissed each other, a small goodnight kiss that might have lead to a confession from either side.  Dave thought about doing it, but waited and waited for Karkat to make the first move.  It never happened, and the moment passed.  He was disappointed, but he kept it in.

"G'night, Kitkat."

Reluctance, then...

"…Night, fucker."

The door closed, and Dave stood there for a few more seconds before walking back to his apartment.  Like fuck was he going to let it go there.  It was almost the end of Valentine's Day, and he wasn't about to let the king of romantic cliches slip by them without so much as a hello.  If Karkat wanted sap and romance, then he was going to fucking get it.

All he needed was the perfect song.

\---

He didn’t have any energy anymore.  
   
Not for anything.  
   
Normally, Jade would've scolded him by now. Talked him some sense, made him realize he was being a twit and get him to think of a new and more romantic master plan to finally fucking confess to the ironic asswipe of the school.  
   
But there was no Jade here today. It was very late, and he’d turned off his phone. He didn’t want to talk to her about ‘fighting for it’ anymore. He had embarrassed himself enough. This was over and he was never trying again. He didn’t want to go back to school- he wanted to move. He wanted to never move and just stay curled up on his bed like he was for the rest of eternity because if no one saw him again, it would be for the better; and maybe in that time he could just rot and die.  
   
His head was pounding and his eyelids were aching. He hadn’t been crying, that would have been the thing that took the fucking cake for just how much of a wreck he was. How putrid of an existence could he manage before he rotted where he lay?  
   
The pounding continued, bouncing off the walls and rattling his skull. Like a bass beat, just loud, frame shaking. Something else was adding to it. Something smooth and almost like--  
   
Karkat sat up too quickly, his head swam, a tear he’d been holding back for hours now leaked a silent red streak down his cheek. He looked to the window.  
   
“What the FUCK?”  
   
He could hear it even clearer- the low, but loud mechanically enhanced sound of someone singing.  
   
Outside his window at two in the morning.  
   
He made his way there, caught somewhere between anger and confusion, until he realized who was singing.  
   
“—I would kiss your eyes, and thank god we’re together. I wanna be with you forever and ever….”  
   
Mouth hanging open, he stared down.  He should have realized before he saw it what was happening; there was really only one person he knew that would do something like this. Well that wasn’t true- a number of his friends were unhinged enough- but-  
   
“STRIDER WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IT’S TWO IN THE FUCKING MORNING PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO FUCKING SLEEP, ASSHOLE.”  
   
Karkat was graced with a smirk. He felt his cheeks flush despite every effort and the medley of negative feelings he’d been graced with for the past several hours centered around the douchnozzle making it happen. He defended the heat in his cheeks with a glare.  
   
And then he waved. Karkat would probably have punched him, had his fist been in range but that wasn’t possible from their positioning.  
   
“Hey there- can’t a guy woo someone without bustin an eardrum? Really, Karkat, you’re gonna wake up the neighborhood.”  
   
“YOU-“ He stopped, words registering after a moment. “I- what?”  
   
That fucking smirk was going to be the end of him.  
   
“Come down here and I’ll show you.” Eyebrows waggled over shades. “Karkat.”  
   
It really bothered him how nice it sounded when Dave said his name.


End file.
